Six Questions Every Empty Nest Mom Should Ask to Discover Her God-Given Purpose

No woman slides quietly or effortlessly into the empty nest. This is a monumental transition, and most of us arrive here feeling unprepared for what comes next or unsure how God is still at work in us.

As we stand on the edge of this new season, the questions get louder:
What’s next?
Who am I apart from motherhood?
Does my life still have purpose, and if so, what is it now?

If you’ve asked any of those questions, you’re not behind. You’re right on time.

Scripture reminds us, “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10). That promise didn’t expire when your kids left home. God’s purposes for you are not tied to one role or one season; they are woven into who you are.

As an Empty Nest Coach, I’ve learned something important: clarity doesn’t come from quick answers. It comes from asking better questions. And questions are exactly what we need in this season of shifting identities and fresh possibilities we didn’t see coming.

Let’s be honest, we’d all love a clarion call from heaven that says, “This is what I created you for. Do this.” But more often than not, God leads us gently, inviting us to look inward and backward before we move forward.

The surest way to uncover your purpose is to become thoughtfully introspective, to mine your story and your God-given motivations for clues to what He’s been preparing you for all along.

So let’s dig.
Here are six questions to help you discover your purpose in the empty nest.
Grab your journal, open your heart, and let’s go looking for gold together.

1. What Are You Passionate About?

What is the one thing your heart keeps circling back to, no matter the season or the responsibilities on your plate?

Another way to ask this is: What sets your soul on fire? What topic, cause, or activity stirs something deep within you and moves you to action?

Passion has a way of rising to the surface without effort. It’s the thing you could talk about for thirty minutes without notes. The conversation that energizes you instead of draining you. The space where you feel most alive, most yourself, and most engaged.

This kind of passion doesn’t feel forced. It doesn’t feel heavy. It feels life-giving. When you’re leaning into it, time passes quickly, and fulfillment comes naturally, not because it’s easy, but because it’s aligned.

Pay attention to what lights you up. God often plants our passions as clues to our purpose. When you follow what He’s been stirring in your heart, you may just find that He’s been preparing you for this season all along.

“Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.”- Psalm 37:4

This verse reminds us that when our hearts are anchored in God, the desires He places within us are not selfish or accidental. Often, our deepest passions are God-given, planted there to draw us toward the good works He’s inviting us into now. As you pay attention to what delights you, trust that God may be revealing something sacred about your purpose in this season.

2. What Are Your Natural Gifts?

God has wired you in very specific ways, and those gifts didn’t disappear when your kids left home.

What comes naturally to you? What do others consistently thank you for or seek you out to help with? Maybe you’re a steady listener, a wise encourager, a creative thinker, an organizer, a teacher, or a natural leader. These abilities often feel ordinary to us because they’ve always been there, but that doesn’t make them insignificant.

Your natural gifts are the things you do with ease and grace, often without formal training. They’re the strengths that quietly show up again and again in your relationships, your work, your church, and your home. While passion points to what excites you, your gifts reveal how God has equipped you to serve.

Scripture tells us, “We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us” (Romans 12:6). That means your gifts are not random, and they are not meant to be compared. They are grace-filled and intentional, designed to be used for God’s glory in this season of your life.

Take inventory without minimizing or dismissing what comes easily to you. God often uses what feels most natural to accomplish what is most meaningful. Your gifts are not leftovers from a past season; they are tools for what He’s calling you into now.

3. How Have You Served in the Past?

Your past is not something to move beyond or dismiss; it’s something to mine for wisdom. As you look back over the years of raising your children, pay attention to the ways you naturally showed up to serve.

Were you the one who stepped in to lead when something needed organizing or direction? The mom who gathered people, made plans, and carried responsibility with confidence? Or were you the quiet servant, the one who noticed needs, offered steady support, and served faithfully behind the scenes with humility and care?

These patterns matter. They reveal how God has shaped you through lived experience. Scripture tells us, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28). God has revealed His purposes in the past, and He will continue to do so in the empty nest.

4. What Motivates You?

This question moves us from what you’re good at to what energizes you. Motivation is about noticing what stirs you to action, what pulls you forward rather than pushes you from behind.

Pay attention to what gives you energy instead of draining it. What activities leave you feeling more alive, more hopeful, or more engaged? What ideas spark enthusiasm and make you want to lean in rather than check out?

Motivation often reveals itself in contrast. Notice what exhausts you and what fuels you. The difference matters. When something aligns with how God has wired you, it feels life-giving, even when it requires effort. You may find yourself thinking, “This is what I was made for. I could do this all day and still have joy.”

Scripture reminds us, “For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill His good purpose” (Philippians 2:13). That inner drive, the desire to show up, serve, create, or lead, may very well be God at work within you, nudging you toward what He’s calling you to next.

Listen closely to what motivates you. God often uses holy desire to guide us into meaningful purpose.

5. What Skills Have You Honed Through Motherhood?

Motherhood has been one of your greatest training grounds, even if it didn’t come with a résumé or a paycheck. Over the years, you’ve developed a distinct and valuable skill set, shaped by love, perseverance, and daily faithfulness.

Think about it. Have you become a clear and firm communicator? A flexible problem-solver or an agile planner? Maybe you’ve built physical strength from years of wrangling toddlers, carrying car seats, or simply showing up day after day. Perhaps you’ve grown into a steady leader, a capable organizer, or a wise decision-maker.

Many moms have also developed deep compassion and empathy through hardship. You may have learned how to advocate fiercely for your child, navigate medical or emotional challenges, or walk through seasons that required courage you didn’t know you had. Those experiences were not wasted; they refined you.

Scripture assures us, “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9). The good work you’ve done in motherhood has produced strength, wisdom, and resilience that can now be stewarded in new ways.

Take time to notice what God has been honing in you all along. The skills shaped in one season often become the tools for purpose in the next. God truly wastes nothing.

6. Where Is God Leading You?

Ultimately, the surest way to discover your purpose is to ask God to lead you and then trust that He will. The One who orders your steps and holds every moment of your life already sees this season clearly. You are not wandering. You are being guided.

This is who your God is. This is how faithfully He cares for you.

Scripture reminds us, “The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in Him” (Psalm 37:23). God is not vague or withholding with His children. He promises to lead, to direct, and to go before you, often one step at a time.

Your role is not to figure everything out. Your role is to get before Him in prayer, invite His guidance, and then keep your eyes open to where He is already at work. Pay attention to recurring nudges, open doors, timely conversations, and the quiet peace that settles when something aligns with His will.

As you pray, ask God to lead, and then listen. Connect your prayers to what He’s unfolding in your real, everyday life. Purpose often reveals itself as we walk with God, not before we move.

There is no need to fear this season or wonder if your purpose has somehow passed you by. You serve a faithful God: one who reveals, directs, and gently guides as you pause, reflect, and grow curious about the life He’s been shaping within you all along.

As you pay attention to what stirs your heart, what motivates your steps, and what brings a holy sense of joy to your soul, trust this: your purpose is not lost; it’s unfolding. It’s been forming through every season of motherhood, every challenge you’ve walked through, and every strength God has quietly cultivated in you.

The empty nest is not an ending. It’s an invitation.

An invitation to listen more closely, to trust more deeply, and to partner with God as He reveals what’s next. You don’t have to rush. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You simply have to show up with an open heart and a willing spirit.

So go ahead. Invite God into the process. Ask the questions. Take the next step.
Your purpose is waiting, and God is eager to walk with you as you discover it. 

Let’s pray.

Dear Papa, I praise you for the woman I am becoming. I don’t want to go back to a younger version of myself. Help me embrace who I am now and see the ways you’ve wired me and made me who I am. I long to know your purpose for this season. Reveal it to me and make it clear. Amen.

Still struggling with letting go?

The Transitional Grief Journaling Guide is a faith-filled resource designed to help empty nest moms process the deep emotions of letting go. Through six guided reflection questions, you’ll name your feelings, invite God into your grief, and discover His comfort in the middle of change. This gentle companion will remind you that transitional grief is only a season and God is leading you toward peace, purpose, and joy.