Why It's Helpful to Respect Your Married Kids' Boundaries

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Why It's Helpful to Respect Your Married Kids' Boundaries

“As the Scriptures say, ‘A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’” - Ephesians 5:31 NLT

A Kindness Extended

I reached for my phone to text our youngest daughter, Keziah, who lives three hours away from us, with her hubby, Forrest. Keziah is a missionary on a college campus, so her days are full with student activities, projects, meeting with students, and leadership training. I typed, “Hey Kizzy, can you look at your schedule to see when dad and I might pop over for a quick visit? I know you’re swamped with end of the year activities, but I miss your face.” 

“Aw, we miss you too. It’s crazy around here. I can’t wait for the school year to be over so we can have a little more time. Let me talk to Forrest and I’ll get back to you. Love ya mom.” she responded.

“Love you too. Can’t wait to see you.” I replied. 

It’s About Respect

Some parents find it silly to ask permission to visit their grown children. They jump in the car with no consideration for their adult child’s previous plans or if their adult children have the capacity for a visit. A simple ask goes a long way in communicating kindness and compassion for our adult children’s lives. This simple gesture communicates, “We understand you’re separate from us now. We want to honor you.” 

 One of the most challenging concepts for a young married couple is how to have boundaries with their parents. First, the couple needs to have brave conversations with each other, then they need to talk to their parents about their established boundaries.  

We can help them take this courageous step when we willingly respect their limits. 

“As the Scriptures say, ‘A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’” - Ephesians 5:31 NLT This is a mandate from God and a clear explanation of what boundaries are for our married children. Our children are to leave their parents and create a family of their own, without our input or influence over their decisions. 

Mom’s Role

What are you doing to encourage your child to leave and cleave to their spouse? 

Moms play a significant role in the success of our child’s marriage when we allow them to leave us and cling to their mate. There will be no more “momma’s boy.” His wife is his new girl. That doesn’t mean you’re not important. It just means you’ll play a secondary role, the way God intended. 

 Will you be a help or a hindrance in the growth of your child’s marriage?

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Exceptional Advice to Triumph with Digital Communication

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Exceptional Advice to Triumph with Digital Communication

Can we talk about cell phones for a hot minute? Goodness, there are so many parameters to consider with our adult children, wouldn’t you agree? We have got you covered with all your digital guidelines!

I recently had Suzy Mighell, Influencer and content creator of the popular blog, Empty Nest Blessed on The Midlife Momma Podcast. Check out episode 60, Finding Your Better Purpose in the Empty Nest, here.

Anyways, she was on the podcast and when we finished recording we had this wonderful conversation about digital communication with our adult children. 

About Suzy

Let me tell you about my online friend, Suzy! She is a ray of sunshine and encouragement. Her Empty Nest Blessed website is a lovely magazine format of fashion, beauty, travel, cooking for two, and parenting adult kids. It’s everything you need to know in the empty nest. She shares oodles of tips and tricks, great finds and heartfelt encouragement. Be sure to check out her website, and follow her on Instagram, and Facebook.


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Back to our conversation…So many moms are filled with questions about how to handle digital communication. We feel compelled to over communicate or maybe we under communicate! If you’re still checking your Life 360 app of your grown child, please delete it today.  Below is our conversation, interview style. We hope you find the tips helpful. Here we go!

WHAT’S A GOOD WAY TO TALK ABOUT DIGITAL COMMUNICATION? WHEN SHOULD I DO IT? HOW DO I KNOW HOW MUCH DIGITAL COMMUNICATION ON MY END IS TOO MUCH? WHAT ARE SOME GOOD RULES OF ENGAGEMENT? HOW DO I HANDLE MY EXPECTATIONS SURROUNDING DIGITAL COMMUNICATION? 

Pamela: Have the conversation when the kids leave home for college, military or the workforce. A simple conversation about communication clears up a lot of things and helps us manage our expectations. I have five kids and we all communicate differently. Some I text with several times a week and others not nearly as much. But I love them all and we feel close to each other. The bottom line is to have clear communication about how you want to communicate when you’re apart. If you’ve failed to talk about this, then now is the perfect time. Clear the air, forgive and start over. You’ll be amazed how much peace you’ll experience moving forward.

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