As we wrap up this part of our series on hearing God’s voice I want to address a common problem that overrides our ability to hear God: the feeling of overwhelm. You’ve heard of it, right?

Overwhelm All-Around

The alarm jars me from a deep sleep. I groan and roll-over, fully aware of my schedule ahead. How am I already tired when the day hasn’t started? I reach for my comfy robe, grab a cup of coffee, and head to my spot. You know, the place I meet with Jesus in the morning. I imagine peace and joy but I’m met with frustration and anger. I try to quiet my racing thoughts. “Focus,” I tell myself. “You can deal with it later. It’s time to concentrate on God.”

Even my quiet time with God feels forced. Where’s the comfort and connection I crave? I’m feeling empty and spent. I wonder if God is disappointed in me?

I get the kids up and breakfast ready. We leave half-eaten bowls of cereal lining the counter as I scoot them out the door with dad. He’ll tell lots of bad dad jokes and they’ll blare the Journey soundtrack on the way to school. It’s the most they’ll see of him, as he’s a pastor and has lots of things to do. There’s always meetings, planning, people in crisis, strife to handle. It never ends for a pastor and his wife. Balancing the logistical needs of a large family with the needs of the church is a whole thing in and of itself.

As I wave them out the door, my mind lands on the challenges my kids, these five cherubs ranging from preschool to high school, are facing these days. How in the world do I have a child in every age range? We’re dealing with growing pains, emotional distress, friendship trouble, homework stress, and bullies at school. The issues are similar, but our kid's ages require different approaches when parenting them through these issues.

I gather the abandoned bowls and rinse them off as I go over my to-do list for the day in my head. Each kid has their own schedule to keep and homework to get done. There are the drop-off and pick-up schedules to mind and dinner to make. Should I tackle laundry first or work on my Bible study for discussion tonight? Oh, wait, I have a dance meeting at four! The little girls have dance rehearsal, Keenan has a concert, Moriah is heading to Sam’s house and Caleb will want to go hang out with a friend after school.

I feel the tightness in my neck and notice my shallow breathing. A wave of low-grade anger simmers below the surface. I’m not mad at people, I’m just frustrated my schedule is so crazy.

I’m overwhelmed by the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of those around me. Really, I’d just like to escape.

Calm the Chaos

The busy days of kids at home are long gone, but I’ll never forget the feelings of overwhelm I lived with most of the time.

Our endless “to-do” list, unrealistic expectations, need for perfection, and limited capacity, leads to overwhelm.

Overwhelm manifests as racing thoughts, tightness in our chest, and weary bodies. We feel this immense pressure.

“Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.” - Ephesians 4:15-16

God places us in a church as a part of the body where Christ is the head, and we are the parts. The parts are interdependent, and God speaks through the parts to benefit the whole. One of the ways we hear God most clearly is through the church.

The Grace of Church

Walking into the service this spring morning I’m shrouded in grief from my empty womb. We miscarry our child. I know the death of a grandparent, but this loss is so personal. This is our baby, the sibling of our firstborn. I feel raw and exposed and a little envious of my two best friends. Their babies seem blissfully safe inside of them. What have I done wrong to lose my baby?

I should stay out of the choir loft this morning, but singing soothes my soul. I’m quiet as I gather my robe and rehearse the warm-up song. I keep my eyes to the ground and concentrate on vocal technique. I will myself to hold it together, but I’m not a good pretender. We take our places in the choir loft. Feelings of sadness and grief overwhelm me as tears roll down my face. I keep singing.

As we leave the platform and go to the choir room, sobs roll from my stomach as my friends surround me. They hold me, care for me, cry with me, and love me. They take turns praying words of life over me. Some recite scripture and others acknowledge my grief. The body of Christ comes together in the most beautiful way to care for me.

Surely Christ is in our midst, in this mangled mess of tears, snot, and hugs. God uses the body of Christ to speak words of support and comfort over my grieving heart. My friends direct my wounded heart to God’s goodness, and their words of compassion feel like a hug from heaven.

As I return to the pews, I listen to the pastor’s message, and his words are just what I need to hear this day. When I come with an open heart to receive, God always speaks through the church. Sometimes it's a message from the pastor or a kind gesture of a friend, but it all points me to God’s voice.

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” Romans 8:28

How we orient our hearts during difficult circumstances will affect our ability to hear God. It’s human nature to lash out and blame when something bad happens. We blame God, accuse Him of neglect, and run from Him. Then we feel utterly alone and lost. We feel abandoned by our Creator when actually we were the ones who ran from Him. How do we make sense of it all?

Reoriented Hearts

When we arrive at our second pastorate, the church is inward-focused and unhealthy. My hubby, the pastor, and I begin the hard work of revitalization. It requires patience and perseverance to shift the culture of a living organization, but, eventually, we do. New life springs forth, lives are impacted. Growth is evident, except the finances remain stagnant, even though my husband faithfully teaches stewardship principles each Sunday. We work faithfully for ten years; we give, pray, and press on.

In the eleventh year, my husband offers to not receive a salary. It isn’t a flippant decision. After much prayer and talking through the options, we agree and have peace. We pray, we wait, and God speaks to us. We believe God is our Provider, not the church; we trust He will supply our needs.

In the past, we experience the faithfulness of God a million times over. We are confident His faithfulness continues. We have a choice to make at this time. How are we to access these circumstances? We have two options: bitterness or trust God.

God proves His faithfulness as He provides another paying job for my hubby. He becomes the Development Director of a men’s homeless shelter. The job fits his giftings perfectly, and it provides new ministry opportunities with homeless men. He also takes on a bus route. I get a part-time job at Marshall’s, in addition to my part-time work at the church. I enjoy the retail job immensely, though it is physically exhausting.

Unexpected checks arrive at just the right time as bills need to be paid. We continue to love the congregation and do the work God calls us to do. God is faithful to our family. When finances are tight, or we feel shaky with our choice, we continue to pray and reorient our hearts to God’s goodness.

I wish I could say a miracle happens and all the finances come in, but they don’t. We do what God asks us to do. As we wait on God that year, our youngest daughter graduates high school, and we feel a release to leave the church. We resign with thankful hearts for the season we had with the church, and are confident God will direct us to our next step.

In God’s faithfulness, He moves us to a new pastoral assignment. We don’t allow the root of bitterness, as we live off of our savings account that year. Instead, we chose to daily look to God for strength and wisdom. We are confident God asks us to take this step of obedience and let go of a paycheck. We listen for God’s voice as we reorient our lives to what He wants to do; we adjust to God’s plans.

“My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways, my ways.” Isaiah 55:8

One of the most common ways God speaks is through prayer. We make prayer hard as we feel insecure or worry too much about what words to use. Others talk too much and don’t listen to God’s voice at all.

In the simplest terms, prayer is communication with God. It’s an honest two-way conversation where love, security, vulnerability, and confidence flow. It’s a place of surrender, petition, thanksgiving, growth, confirmation, lament, joy, and freedom. Prayer is a relationship with God where we adjust to His purposes. Often it’s the place we hear God speak most clearly.

Morning Prayers

I roll out of bed usually before the alarm goes off. I’m not super “chipper” like my hubby, but I’m not grumpy either. I don’t need immediate interaction. I make a bee-line downstairs for my Gigi mug and fill it with rich Caribou coffee and a splash of half and half.

I climb the stairs in our quiet home and head to my office/prayer room. The walls are a soft grey with white sheers over the abundant windows. It’s my favorite room in the house because it’s serene and welcoming. I plop into my cozy chair and drape a fuzzy blanket over my legs. My Bible, notebook, and pen are ready to record my conversation with Papa.

The mood is relaxed and my heart is expectant. I calm my thoughts and focus on what I’m feeling. Am I anxious, upset, fearful, frustrated, joyful, or at peace? Is there a pressing matter weighing on my heart and thoughts?

I reach for my Bible and turn to today’s passage in my reading plan. I’m certain the Word will address what I’m feeling. I ponder the passage and think about context and the attributes of God’s character and I ask how this truth applies to my life today.

I don’t use fancy words or wonder how to talk to God. I’m just myself as I pour out my honest emotions and process the adjustments I need to make. Is there an attitude that needs correction? Is there someone I need to forgive? What revelation do I need to understand about God and His activity in my life?

“Oh, how great are God’s riches and wisdom and knowledge!’ Romans 11:33a

Now that we understand God speaks, it’s time to talk about how He speaks.

The number one way God speaks is through His Word. Before we move forward, it’s helpful to think about our view of the Bible. Do you see it negatively because you’ve felt preached at, or condemned by someone who has taught from the Word? Do you find God’s Word confusing and contradictory, so you avoid it? Are you easily bored with God’s Word? Do you believe the Bible is the inspired Word of God? These mindsets will have an effect on how you relate to the scriptures. It’s good to evaluate your perception of the Word.

God Speaks to Me

Part of my morning routine is intentional interaction with God through His Word. I’ve practiced this rhythm for over 30 years. I’ve done it with nursing babies and wiggly toddlers at my feet. I’ve done it when trials loom large and hopelessness wants to swallow me whole. I’ve done it through the pain of injury and interpersonal strife. I’ve met with God when my love grows cold, and when my attitude needs adjustment. I’ve sat with God in deep sorrow and celebratory joy, and each time I learn something new about who God is.

I sit in a comfy chair, wrapped in a blanket with my favorite cup of Caribou Mahogony blend, my Bible, and a notebook in hand. I come with an attitude of expectancy. The Bible is a love letter from God to me and I look forward to what Papa wants to say to me. Some days He speaks encouragement, others we’ll deal with a heart issue or attitude that needs attention. At times the Holy Spirit will deposit revelation and understanding. The Holy Spirit’s job is to reveal the truth to me.

As I read the Word, I search for clues of who God is. I don’t like to read too much, just enough to understand the context of a passage. I pay attention to verbs or action words. What God does and says are clues to who He is. What character trait is highlighted in the passage? Is it His power, wisdom, compassion, love, faithfulness, sovereignty, enduring love, or kindness? I like to write down my thoughts in a journal, so I can look back at what God spoke. We never come to the end of all there is to learn about God.

“My sheep hear my voice and I know them, and they follow me.”-John 10:27

My intention with this series is to alleviate some of the pressure or shame we feel as we relate to God. I don’t want you to feel defeated or less than because you struggle to hear God’s voice.

Some of us have a hard time quieting ourselves to hear God speak. Others don’t want to hear what God has to say out of fear. Many struggle with discerning their thoughts versus God’s voice. Still, others wrestle with the lies of the enemy rumbling around their heads.

Hearing God speak is a learned skill and can only happen as a result of your loving union with Him.

It’s why I started this series with your understanding that we connect with God from a position of love. You love Him and He loves you, and everything we do will build off of this foundation.

God Speaks

I was hours away from the church service that changed the trajectory of my life. I surrendered my heart to God and was made new in an instant, and I wanted to live my life for God. I could not contain the joy I felt with my decision to follow Christ. The world was bright and filled with hope, and I was wrapped in a blanket of God’s love and acceptance. I was a sophomore in college home for Christmas break. It was January 5, 1986, and I was to return to the school that evening.

I thought of the relationship I had been in the past two years. My boyfriend’s name was Paul; he was selfish, arrogant, and cold. Why did I even think I loved him when he treated me so poorly? What was wrong with me, that I stuck with him?

I whispered a quiet prayer to my Savior and I said, “God what do I do?” I didn’t hear an audible voice, but I heard a thought. “You don’t need him. I have better things ahead for you. Let him go.”

Wow! Did I just hear from God? I’m enveloped in this deep sense of peace coupled with wonder. I return to my dorm to call Paul and tell him of my experience with God, and my desire to break-up. It wasn’t dramatic. I was simply honest, and I never hear from him again.

As the months continue, I pray for a Godly man. Don’t think I didn’t throw in a “and God, can you make him tall, too?” request. I’m introduced by my cousin to a tall, handsome banker. He’s a little older and has a nice car and takes me to nice restaurants, but when I tell him of my love for God, we have no connection. I’m crushed, but once again, in prayer, the Holy Spirit whispers, “Trust me, I have something better.” So, I wait and see.

“How precious is your steadfast love, O God! Psalm 36:7

We continue our series on building a close connection with God. We need to train our ears to hear His voice. God’s voice is a whisper, and in order to hear it, we must remain close to Him. He only reveals Himself and His voice to those who have cultivated an intimate, loving relationship.

There is one foundational truth needed for us to be able to hear God’s voice. It seems elementary to note, but if we miss this one point, we will not be able to hear God’s voice. God loves you. Just as you are, right where you’re at.

God loves you!

Let that sink in a little more. We have to settle it in our hearts from the beginning that God loves us and wants to speak to us. Without understanding His love, we won’t hear His voice.

Does God Love Me?

I’m fourteen and shuffled off to a Confirmation retreat with a bunch of wiggly eighth graders. Really, we’re just happy to get away together. We giggle and gag as we discover boxes of Raisin Bran filled with cobwebs as we prepare for breakfast the first morning of the retreat. Oh my gosh, when was the last time someone was in this camp kitchen?

I know nothing of this thing called Confirmation. What am I even confirming? I think someone mentioned my baptism, but what does that mean to a kid who barely graces the doors of a church? I’m just an awkward teen looking for fun and a few days away from the chaos at home.

The coneflower blue sky is brilliant against copper leaves as I walk in the woods. I sense God’s love outside in the sun. I felt this way often as a young girl. I wonder if this is a normal way for others to sense God’s love? Why would He even love me? I’ve done nothing exceptional. I’m a nobody who feels insecure and unloved. The pastor speaks of God’s love, and I want to believe it, but there’s all this proof that I’m not loved. What do I do with the evidence?

I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do with this feeling, this joy, and warmth rising in my chest. Someone help me find my way to God. I want to walk in His light, but shame keeps me in the shadows. The feeling is fleeting as I don’t know who to turn to. But that day, in the sun, I knew God loved me. I could feel it. I could taste it. I felt wrapped in it, for certain, even if it was only a few fleeting moments. God was drawing me with His love.

Hearing from God does not depend on a formula or a method but rather a relationship. First, we must be assured that God loves us. Love is the foundation we build upon as we learn to hear His voice.